A Pilgrimage is NOT a Retreat...
The first Joyful Mystery of the Rosary: The Annunciation. Located on Apparition Hill, Medjugorje
…nor is it even a vacation, or conference, or anything else I’ve ever been to.
A pilgrimage is soft. It’s work. It’s quiet. It’s spartan. It’s nothing and yet everything.
“A religious pilgrimage is a journey to a sacred place or shrine, often undertaken for spiritual reasons, such as seeking forgiveness, fulfilling a vow, or expressing devotion. It's a physical journey that can also be a metaphor for an individual's spiritual path, reflecting an inward journey toward deeper understanding and connection with one's faith.”
I recently went to Medjugorje, a town in Bosnia-Herzegovina where it has been reported that Mary, the Mother of Jesus, has been appearing to a set of visionaries for 44 years. Whether you believe in such things or not, Medjugorje has become a sacred place to Catholics the world over. I know over a dozen people who have gone, each one coming back in love with themselves, with God, and humanity at large. It has been called, “The School of Peace,” because the messages from the apparitions have been clear, simple, and consistent the entire time. Our Lady has appeared to teach us how to find peace on Earth.
It's a simple message really, her advice is basically to find peace in your own hearts, then family, then community, then the world. There will be no peace without each of us first taking the time to heal our wounds, forgive those who have hurt us, and grow in peace. Each and every one of us, no exceptions. This is the message of the Gospels, it’s not new, Medjugorje simply stands as a reminder of what we already know.
I’m not writing though about the specifics of the apparitions. If you’re interested, you can get most of your information on MaryTV. What I want to share is how different a pilgrimage is to a retreat.
I’ve gone on many retreats. Some religious, some secular. Most of the time the retreat is focused on making sure you feel pampered. There’s usually a speaker there who is the center of things. They set the agenda and the program. Accommodations are nice, food is top shelf, and there are activities and entertainment. My trip to Medjugorje did include some great meals, but otherwise, it wasn’t so much about someone speaking to me about faith, self-improvement, or any other topic. Instead, it was about spending time with God. Going directly to the source via a sacred place, one dedicated to worship of God rather than focusing on the self.
Medjugorje is no Esalen, let’s put it this way. There are no resorts in sight. No swimming pools. All lodgings are simple and basic. Pensions with small, spartan rooms, an eating area, and a garden to sit in. My room had two twin beds, white walls, a crucifix, closet, and wooden table. Basic and empty, sort of how I felt by the end of the pilgrimage. Basic, because that’s really what peace is, so basic it’s almost terrifying. Empty because the I hours spent in prayer and worship, showed me the reality that I was to let go of my ego, my dreams, my personal desires, which thus emptied me out, allowing God to fill that space.
Where I go from here, I truly have no idea.
A Pilgrim’s Journey
This was my first time to Bosnia and Croatia, and yet I didn’t see anything beyond the town of Medjugorje itself. It wasn’t a vacation, rather each day was filled with attending to the soul. I went to confession in the square outside the church of St. James. I went to Mass four times in one week, once with over 100,000 people! I prayed the Rosary every day. Went to Eucharistic Adoration most days. Toured an addiction center. Hiked up Apparition Hill twice, once at sunrise and once at sunset, barefoot. We also hiked Cross Mountain at 5:30 in the morning. I saw more sunrises than I have in decades. I slept little. I read books about fasting and prayer. I read the Bible.
On the second night there, I walked home alone from a youth event held at St. James church. Under the almost full moon, I wandered out of town and got lost. Suddenly, I was in the country, only the illuminated cross on Cross Mountain to guide me and give me some sense of where my lodgings were. Never once did it cross my mind that I was alone. That I might be in danger. It’s hard to explain, but the place never gave off that vibe. It was nothing but peace. At one point, I had to take off my sandals because they were giving me blisters. So I walked home barefoot along their sidewalks. No glass or debris in sight. They were clean in a way I never see in America, at least not in Santa Cruz or Chicago. As I walked, I heard the murmur of people sitting on their porches, listening in on the radio to the event being celebrated at the church. Or families laughing and playing games at twilight. Where there would be mailboxes in our neighborhoods, there were little family shrines to Mary, Jesus, or Michael the archangel slaying the dragon.
It was like Disneyland for Catholics.
I will admit, by the end of the week I was pretty sure I could never be a cloistered nun, prayer all day is not my thing. Yet I never again want to live a life without prayer, without Mass. In these things, I found peace, something I still have even though it’s been a week later. I figure if the people of Medjugorje can open up their town to millions of pilgrims and remain in a state of peace, I can do it living my regular life.
The Humble Servant
One of the most compelling things I experienced was the humility of my host, Ivan Dragicevic, one of the six visionaries who still receives daily messages from Our Lady. Given he’s one of the major reasons for the town to have achieved such fame, in many ways he is a star of his community. I’ve been to Esalen and other conferences and retreats in California and I assumed he’d be like all the other “channelers” I’ve experienced—the center of the event, boldly proclaiming his knowledge and messages, selling his books, videos and other ten step programs to peace.
This was not the case. Ivan hasn’t written any books. When asked how we should accomplish peace, he states what Our Lady has told him—pray with the heart. He doesn’t teach a thing, rather he leaves the spiritual direction up to a priest and the history, background, and tour guide stuff to Ivanka, his dear friend and interpreter since the 80s. Instead of being the center of attention, seeking new followers and adherents, Ivan serves you breakfast and dinner, gives you a smile, and asks how your day is going. We were granted the opportunity every evening after dinner to join him in his chapel, where he prays the Rosary to prepare for his daily visit from Our Lady. Then the apparition happens and with his interpreter, Ivanka, he shares the message with us. Once he joined us on a walking tour from his childhood home to Apparition Hill, recounting the day Mary first appeared to him and the other the children. He shared his hard life as a tobacco farmer (forced on them by the Communist Yugoslavian government) as well as how scared he was when all of this started to happen. On another occasion, he took us to the location where he and the other five children would host weekly prayer groups where Mary would appear to the locals and share her messages to teach them the way of peace. These groups were held in secret behind abandoned homes at the base of the hill because in those days they were under Communist rule and weren’t allowed to gather in large groups and the officials had just arrested their priest for hosting them in the church.
His story is remarkable, but more remarkable is his humility. Rather than seeking fame, he seeks to create a space where people can come and see without any fanfare or obligation. Rather than being the center of attention, he serves you food and loads your bags into the bus. He has nothing to sell other than his dedication to Mary. Think on this—he’s been setting aside time everyday at 6:00 pm local time, wherever he is in the world no matter what, to receive Mary’s messages for 44 years. He has more channelings than 90% of the channelers out there, yet there isn’t a single book written by him. Instead, he gives the messages over to the priests of St. James and they document them. Ivan is one of six visionaries, and the others are just like him. Quiet, humble, loyal, and dedicated to peace in our hearts.
"Peace, peace, peace and only peace"
This is one of the earliest messages to the children of Medjugorje, yet it is also the heart of all the messages since. Truly, to go on pilgrimage is to seek peace. It’s not to seek knowledge, a new way of living, or even new habits. Rather a pilgrimage is subtler, it stirs the heart, and plants seeds. You feel different when you leave, but there’s an emptiness as well. Not refreshment necessarily, but something beyond words. I imagine a poet could describe the realization that comes after a week in God’s care. I certainly can’t. All I can say is taking the time to visit a sacred place and center all your activities on God—not self-improvement, or classes, or a gathering of knowledge, contacts, or life hacks, or even touring and seeing the sights—but adoring your creator and nothing else, is centering, and perhaps even necessary.